Southern Fried Snark Episode 33

Show Notes:
Katie Holmes NOT on Glee but Javier Bardem and John Stamos will be

http://www.imdb.com/news/ni3174760/

Jessica Simpson new BF

http://www.eonline.com/uberblog/b188937_did_jessica_simpson_score_another_nfl.html?cmpid=rss-000000-rssfeed-365-topstories&utm_source=eonline&utm_medium=rssfeeds&utm_campaign=rss_topstories

Good news for the Mullet

http://www.startribune.com/nation/97838839.html?elr=KArks:DCiUocOaL_nDaycUiacyKU7DYaGEP7vDEh7P:DiUX

Waity Katie

http://worldblog.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2010/06/06/4469761-prince-waity-katie-set-for-40-million-wedding

Jake and Vienna-the breakup

Breaking news-Lilo goes to jail!

http://omg.yahoo.com/news/judge-sends-lohan-to-jail-for-probation-violation/43395?nc

iPad giveaway

Blogluxe

Southern Fried Snark Episode 24

Show Notes:
Boot Camp revisit – LAST WEEK!

Heidi Montag doesn’t like being touched on her ass. Though I’m surprised she can feel it.

http://perezhilton.com/2010-04-13-heidi-montag-alleges-sexual-assault-from-hills-creator

Jessica Simpson making the rounds .. and looking rounded:

http://socialitelife.celebuzz.com/archive/2010/04/13/jessica_simpsons_weight_-_round_386.php

“Billy the Exterminator” star busted .. for roaches. (I CAN’T EVEN MAKE THIS STUFF UP, IT’S SO GOOD.)

http://www.tmz.com/2010/04/13/billy-the-exterminator-ricky-lee-bretherton-reality-show-arrest/

Moment of Silence: We honor the original lady of Snark, Miss Julia Sugarbaker (Dixie Carter).

http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20360413,00.html

Okay: can we just talk about all of the hate that’s out there recently?

* the fake prom to deter lesbian couple in MS
* This in New Jersey
* The Pope likening the accusation of sexual misconduct by priests to the persecution of Jews during the Holocaust
* WTF IS GOING ON WITH PEOPLE?!

Oh, the knowledge that would come with this pairing: John Tesh and Oprah were once a couple.

http://marquee.blogs.cnn.com/2010/04/13/john-tesh-confirms-he-dated-oprah/

Chocolate bacon funnel cake is now on the menu at Knott’s Berry Farm.

Discovery Communications agrees to pay Sarah Palin $1.2 million per episode to host the TV series “Sarah Palin’s Alaska.” Episodes to include “Aerial Wolf Hunt” and “Drill, Baby, Drill.”

According to Kitty Kelley’s new book, Oprah once said, “Oprah does not do stairs.” My new mantra.

Library of Congress to save “tweets”

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/04/15/technology/15twitter.html?src=me&ref=technology

Southern Fried Snark Episode 23

Show Notes:

Introduce Mr. Joe Martin, famed winner of Channel 19 WHNT’s Best of the Valley: Best Place to Workout, 2010!!

Chelsea Handler in a war of words with .. Jesse James’ neo-Nazi mistress.  Shouldn’t be a fair fight, right? WRONG.

Tori and Dean: Home Sweet Divorce? Tori dispels rumors, but the tape is still rolling..

Rob Blago..joy..voi..ovich fired from Celebrity Apprentice.  More importantly: HE DIDN’T KNOW HOW TO TURN ON A COMPUTER.

IPAD GIVEAWAY:
RULES AND FIRST THREE QUESTIONS ANSWERED

Kim Kardashian to start advertising for QuickTrim. Also, here’s her booty in a bikini.

Lauren Conrad: I screwed up my hair so these are all extensions. You go, girl.

Nicolette Sheridan sues “Housewives” creator Marc Cherry for abuse and gender .. something or other.  Also, she does this a lot.  Allegedly.

Dancing with the Bling: Ochocinco provides “gift” to partner Cheryl Burke .. a ring valued over $10K.

Jessica Simpson: we like men in Uganda. They think “fat” is beautiful. ALSO, SARAH IS MOVING TO UGANDA.

BREAKING: Jon Gosselin to sue “absentee parent” Kate for custody of all kids.

Speaking of freakish parenting: Hypnobirth.  Tiffany Amber Thiessen plans to do it.  What say ye?

Investment Opportunity for Gellman: Nicholas Cage’s Malibu mansions for sale:

TV’s Gay Teens, Having a Moment:

And, in news absolutely no one cares about, Michael Lohan (father to LiLo) and Kate Majors (ex of Jon Gosselin) are engaged.

First set of iPad Giveaway Questions revealed!

Jessica Simpson definitely was making a point when she loudly announced that her spread in Marie Claire would feature NO makeup, NO product, and NO retouching.

Thing is, people ain’t buyin’ what she’s sellin’.

Although, yes, it’s clear that she is not as made-up as she typically is, many are saying that she’s clearly been retouched and there’s been a bit of Photoshopping done to her images.

You be the judge.

Edited to Add: Apparently Britney is taking the same bold move.. although hers REALLY don’t look retouched.

So I saw a banner ad the other day that reminded me that LC (Lauren Conrad of The Hills to those of you with taste in tv) has a new clothing line at Kohl’s.  I went to go check it out because, well, I’m that person.

The first thing that I admired/wondered about her line was that she said she “enjoyed designing for all shapes of women”.  Hm.  Well, LC grew up in the OC, then moved to LA.  I’m not sure how many SHAPES of women there are in those two locales.. judging by what TV has shown us, there is only busty and bustier.. but hey!  Maybe she’s taken a hint from some former stars who promised the same and then never stocked anything over a size 6.

(AHEM, JLO.)

I actually rather love this maxi dress.  Then again, I live in Alabama, so I’m a sucker for any maxi dress.

I love this tee for many reasons.  One, I love to layer.  And this is a GREAT tee for layering.  Two, it would work with a pair of dress capris as well as jeans.  Three, nevermind, I don’t need three, I’m going to buy this anyway.

Same with this tee.  Nautical stripes are HUGE this season, and this is a robust-enough top that it will carry you past the ahoy, matey phase.  Plus, you can wear some great statement necklaces with this (just make sure they’re one color) and I adore that.

While we’re also talking about stars and their clothing lines, I found some of THE CUTEST dresses while dress shopping the other day.

This Jessica Simpson dress is just SO PRECIOUS.  I loved the spring-y look of it and it felt like I was suited up for a garden party.

This LBD by Kristin Davis is so perfect.  It was cut well, hugged curves while slimming.. just perfect.

And, of course, chances are that if you adore a celebrity, they’ve started their own clothing line so that you can show that adoration through cold, hard cash.

(Like, “Sheen Kidz — by Charlie Sheen”?  REALLY?)

(Photos: Kohls, Belk)

Southern Fried Snark Episode 10

Show Notes:

John Mayer has SERIOUS foot-in-mouth disease – Link

Kate Gosselin‘s new book, I Just Want You to Know: Letters to My Kids on Love, Faith, and Family, is set to come out this spring.

Alexander McQueen – death

Jillian Michaels lawsuit – Link

Things we love for Valentine’s Day

Southern Fried Snark Episode 8

Show Notes:

Cindy Margolis Orders Sperm Samples From Contestants in New Dating Show – Link

Jessica Simpson VHI docu-reality series, The Price of Beauty, premieres March 15 – What is this?

Dermaroller -Link

Hard-ons on male models – Link