Southern Fried Snark

I always find the word “stars” questionable when used in conjunction with “Dancing with the….”   I feel that the producers and I have a different definition of the word “stars.”

Anyway… the cast for the upcoming season will be announced officially  on Monday but of course there are rumors galore.  Here is what we are hearing through the interwebs.

Confirmed (allegedly)

Rick Fox – I had to google him.  He dates Eliza Dushku so he gets points for that.

Michael Bolton – I wonder if has gotten a hair cut lately…I wouldn’t know because NO ONE CARES!

Bristol Palin -famous for being the knocked up Pres of the celibacy club doesn’t make you a “star”

Jennifer Gray – YES! NOBODY PUTS BABY IN A CORNER! I will watch to see if someone puts the “lift” in!  THEY HAVE TO!

Audrina Patridge – boring

The Situation- train wreck

David Hasselhoff – judge not lest ye be judged. I guess we get to see if he’s “got talent.”

Brandy and Florence Henderson - i have nothing….

And we have it on good authority that despite the rumors they won’t be joined by either Kirstie Alley, Landon Donovan, Troy Aiken or any of The Bachelor or Bachelorette cast members.

Will this cast make you want to set your TIVO?

I have to go now….there are so many Dirty Dancing clips on youtube calling my name!

We have all seen more of Levi than we ever expected. Way more.

ummm where was I ….? OH!

(well…he is nice to look at….sorry)

(I am easily distracted by shiny things and naked six packs…I am only HUMAN)

(Hey Amy – no shower curtain here!)

So anyway… he was part of the scandal that cast a shadow over the Palin for VP campaign, but he seemed descent enough when he ponied up an engagement after knocking up the ever celibate Bristol. Well despite a baby and future MIL that is a hot Tina Fay look a like…the relationship and engagement to Bristol just doesn’t work out. Scandal. So in an attempt to find himself (all of him…) Levi takes it all off and struts it out for Playgirl. I guess that got some attention because he and Bristol hooked back up…for about a month.  No one cares why it didn’t work.

BUT NOW…. he is (of course) after another 15 minutes of FAME! (I’m gonna live forever)

He is starring in his own reality show about running for public office… Mayor of Wassila! I have no doubt that this is meant to be a stunt and maybe he will win…but because on occasion I have the sense of humor of a 12 year old,  I THINK IT IS FUNNY!  (I know…I just can’t help it!)

Apparently his first campaign stop was at a local GUN SHOW!  (See Amy…another thing you two have in common!) You can’t make stuff this good up.  He was playing politician…shaking hands and babies.  It has also been said that he engaged in quite a conversation about hunting sheep.

Sheep?  Do you really have to hunt them?  Are they crafty or super fast…and I just don’t know?  I looked around and found them on Wikipedia.  Apparently their speed isn’t important to anyone else.  It wasn’t mentioned.  They are a little crafty … they are apparently good climbers on rocky terrain and they use that to their advantage.   (See…at SFS we want to educate and inform)

I am actually probably really going to watch this show…at least to find out more about the sheep.  Will you be watching?

So I know Sarah has been anxiously awaiting for the Levi Johnston issue of Playgirl magazine… Well it will hit the newsstands on Feb 22!  Apparently he avoids the full monty by enlisting the help of a hockey glove.  (interesting)

If you are just dying for a sneak peek (and I know you are)… you can check out the cover here.